How To Reconcile With Your Loved One & Rebuild a Broken Relationship?
Posted: Saturday, September 11, 2010
by Chiradeep
e-Counseling
A relationship is what that gives us strength and reason to live and survive. A relationship is the only potion that prevents and cures loneliness, depression, distress and sadness. A relationship is the only mean and measure that helps us to find a way. A relationship gives us authority on each other’s lives. A relationship is the radar or rudder of our life boat. When a relationship is broken we find ourselves in the middle of the sea, sinking down in the water inch by inch.
When we look around we find many broken relationships in the world today. I feel burdened for the broken relationships. My heart aches when I see a home is torn wide apart and shattered. I feel so sad to see a child getting parted and divided physically, mentally & spiritually between two separated or divorced parents.
I know there are many among us who are broken yet want to be united back again with their loved ones. I know there are many husbands who want their wives to come back to their arms. I know there are many wives who want to reconcile with their husbands. And I also know that it’s never too late to mend a broken relationship. It’s never impossible to get back and reconcile. It’s never shameful to get back to your loved one.
But the biggest difficulty that stands as mountain before us is, HOW TO RECONCILE? HOW TO REBUILD? HOW TO START?
I have 7 simple yet important factors that will help us to reconcile & rebuild a broken relationship which I have mentioned as under:
Materials Needed:
Love, Emotion, Initiative, Understanding, Humility, Forgiving Attitude, Patience & Prayer
1. It’s Our Need
A relationship can be restored only when we have the desire to reconcile and rebuild. Unless we have a longing to come together or unite together we can’t imagine of rebuilding. When we feel that reconciling or rebuilding the relationship with my loved one is our own need then only we will have the desire to take a step forward.
2. Taking the first step
I have seen in life, we always tend to expect the first initiation from the opposite party. I have also has the experience in my own life that if I want to reconcile then I have to take the first step. I can’t expect that somebody will come and give a glass of water when I feel thirsty. I need to express my feelings or ask for a glass of water or get it myself. The process of reconciliation and rebuilding starts when we take the first initiation in response to our own need.
3. Expect Denial
When we are on the verge of rebuilding & reconciliation we should always be ready for denial of our attempts. The other person may not want to rebuild or reconcile initially. So we should not be disappointed with her/his denial, we should be ready to face that accept it in a very positive way.
4. Patience is the Key
We should never lose our patience. We should always remember that “breaking is much easier than rebuilding." We need patience. We need perseverance. We have to keep coming again and again to reconcile. And one day when we succeed we have to start rebuilding slowly.
5. A Humbling experience
It is really not at all easy to come again and again expecting a response to our invitation to reconcile and rebuild the broken relationship. It is a humbling experience. We need to humble ourselves as much as possible in the process of reconciling & rebuilding. When we face denial our ego may challenge us to take a step back and stop thinking of bending down again. But we need to remember that rebuilding is our need and we have to bend down again and again to reconcile, to recreate and to rebuild.
6. Asking Forgiveness
We may say, ‘I was not wrong.’ But we should remember that we were also part of that act of breaking our relationship. So we need to ask forgiveness from our partner, from our children, from our parents or whoever it may be.
7. Faith in Our Love
The Bible says ‘love never fails.’ It is the truth. When we have true love springing up from our heart nothing can stop us. Love really never fails. So we need to have faith in our love for our beloved. That will win the battle for you.
I have never said above that these are 7 steps to reconcile & rebuild, rather I said that these are 7 important factors involved in the process of reconciling and rebuilding. All these factors have to work together. It’s not that we will finish the no.1 step then try out the 2nd one but all these have to work together and then only we can expect a rebuilt relationship.
Freinds! Let's start our reconciling & rebuilding process with a prayer. May God bless us to cherish a reconciled and rebuilt relationship.
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Top-level comments on this article: (9 total)Very good article Chiradeep. Wonderful advice that will certainly work if people really want to put forth the effort to save their relationships.Thank you Linda for thinking it as effective.
Rebuilding may seem more difficult than breaking, but can be infinitely more rewarding. Good tips.You are right Val, rebuinding is always rewarding.Thanks for commenting.
I thought this was well written and had well thought out information in it. Thanks for sharing.Thank you Sir, for rating this article as good. Thanks for commenting.
Good article with some helpful hints thanks for sharing.Thank you Sir, for thinking it as helpful.Thanks for commenting.
Wise words CP. It is evident that relationships take work. The results are worth it. Thank you for the reminder.GraceThanks Grace, for the comment.Rebuilding relationship is the mission. I will keep doing that till the end.
Very nice article! And the pointers are extremely "doable". It's a 7-step reconciliation process. Good job!Thanks Khris, for a sweet comment.
It's a good article. Can help many people...Thanks dear for your comment...
I'm just starting the process of reconcilling with my former girlfriend/partner. I left the relationship because I was not feeling as though I was being apreciated and that I couldn't give her what she wanted. After I ended the realtionship, I moved to another state to help my mom who was in a jam thinking I was ready to get out of the relationship. After some serious me time, I began to realize the mistakes and misunderstandings I had made. In a way, it seemed I had to step back to realize that what she wanted was connection and not to control me. When I came to that realization, I began to start missing everything about her from that new lens. That I had given up something incredibly rare and special. I know I need to work on my communication skills and learn about letting my fears of emotion go. I have been communicating with her and am getting ready to move back. She wants me to find a seperate place, which I think is good. I find that all of the factors you list resonate with me and are helping me keep myself honest about this next step. Thank You.
thanks very much Chiradeep for your advice,i think it will help me to sail through,reconciling and rebuilt my fallen relationship.
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