The Costs Of Premarital Sex
Posted: Friday, August 22, 2008
by Chiradeep
e-Counseling
The audio version of this article is available. Just press play.
Our God loves relationship. He created man and woman and wanted them to be as intimate as possible. Thats why He created marriage. We all know that marriage unites a man and a woman and sex improves it. So He created sex for them. He had planned it so beautifully and uniquely and much before they were created. He created sex because it helps them to be UNIQUE. It helps them to be ONE. It helps them to be INSEPARABLE. Yes! Of course it is true that our mind and soul are first priorities in any relationship and they are more important aspects than sex but it does improve a marital bond. Sex is a wonderful gift of God for the married couples.
They need to know that Sex is a powerful force & to be used properly; that is within the boundary of marriage. If it is not used properly, people indulge in it have to pay a heavy cost. You may ask what cost? I would love to explain that as follows:
Costs of Pre-marital Sex
Premarital sex puts and adverse effect on the person engaged, as well as it affects few other aspects of life that are directly associated to that person.
Adverse effects on the person:
Mind:
Sexual activity arrests the minds of the young people or any adult. They become deprived psychologically. Their social and academic development gets affected terribly. Their academic performances and performances in their work places decreases. Premarital sex is unsatisfactory, especially for girls as its not secure.
As we know sex unites a man and a woman and when each time a person gets involved in varied sexual encounters and moves out of it that affects his / her mental faculty a lot. These encounters are like small marriages and divorces. And this affects his / her family life when he / she actually gets married and live with a different person. The sexual memories will haunt the person day and night, years after years. Premarital sex leaves a scar, which torments that person throughout his / her life.
Body:
The youth or any adult involved in premarital sex may contract one of the many venereal diseases rampant today. They can also contract the deadliest disease like AIDS, because condoms dont give 100% protection. In the later stage or after marriage they can become Infertile because of sexually transmitted diseases.
Young girls or single adults may suffer from unwanted pregnancies, abortions, miscarriages etc.
Soul:
Premarital sex is a sin. When people go against the nature or God they cannot live in peace. Some people live in severe guilt because of sexual compulsion. Neither they can disclose it nor they can leave the habit. Sometimes they feel degraded morally also. Sometimes they feel very lonely. Many people commit suicide for the guilt of sexual sins.
Adverse effects on the other aspects of life:
Society:
Society doesnt allow these things. When somebody is exposed he or she is shunned and put to shame in the society. Rest of the people in the society stop talking and mingling with the persons family who is exposed of premarital sexual encounter. The story of person exposed encourages other singles or young people to get involve in premarital sex, which is really a bad sign for the society.
Family:
The youth or the single adult involved in premarital sex can bring shame to themselves as well as to their families. The parents and other relatives of that person feel ashamed to show their faces before outsiders.
Children born:
The children that are born outside marriage can have terrible psychological problems, because of single parents. They may have to face taunting words in schools, colleges and even in work places.
My dear young and single adult friends! The costs of premarital sex are very heavy and painful. So do not engage yourself in premarital sex, for which you may have to pay a very high and costly price later. WAIT is the key word for you. Wait till you are married. Enjoy the wonderful gift of sex after marriage. May God bless you.
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More commentsHi Candles, very well put and a great biblical layout. Your stated well, "little marriages and divorces" God says ecerytime you engage in sexual intimacy you become one with that person. It is a spiritual thing whether the person is a believer or not. When they move on, they have left a part of themselves they can never get back.One other thing you mentioned was society. Unfortunately, in the US, society has made if acceptable, in fact it is encouraged. Even to live together before marriage. The hearts of men are growing cold toward the things of God just as He told us would happen. The sad part is people do not realize that many of the problems they face are a direct result of sin.Thank you for taking on a tough subject. God bless you and may your candle continue to burn brightly in a dark world.Thanks Teresa! It is really difficult today to control people. Everybody wants to live according to their free will. Children don't want Parents' control. But Parents need to give time for them. Thats most important in today's world. God Bless you...
Excellent article, Candles, as usual! And like the others have said, what you've said is absolutely true. In our society too, such behaviour is becoming more prevalent and more acceptable by the day.Thanks for your comment. Kolkata was quite conservtive in this regard but now a days, it has crossed all other cities also. I don't know how to bring an awareness, and Godly values...
Very good article. Very much true in regards to Indian context...Keep it up
Thanks for the thoughts ... for youth who live alone in different cities, away from parents and away from any kind of restrictions, this has become extremely rampant ... and is so common now that it has become a common norm. Amazing how the devil can work! We need to pray for the youth of our nation and around the world, so that they can HOLD STEADFAST to what the word of God has to say about premarital sex.I agree with khristina. when youth stay alone its very difficult. we have to holdfast our faith.
Great article and very much appropriate to Indian context...keep it up.
Hi Candles,I respect your view and you speak wisely and while I am anti underage sex and condoms in schools and many other things, premarital sex is not one of them.The worst mistake any young person can make is getting married just so they can have sex and yes that happens!Love will bring a greater appreciation of intimacy, but sometimes people are just so incompatible in this area that eventually that is the source of discontent and they may either look outside the relationship for fulfillment or end it altogether.I think informed safe sex (at the right age and with the right information and with protection) is acceptable before marriage for these reasons.Thanks for the comments CB. But I don't agree with sex before marriage at all. It is against the nature's as well as God's law. Can we challenge God? I am sorry, I cannot go beyond God's standard.God did not invent marriage, man did. In the days of old, men 'married' girls as young as 9. Is this right? Just because religious texts make it so? I don't think so.
I understand your beliefs and respect them, but understand people's beliefs differ when it comes to God. I do not agree marriage is God's law. Thus no challenge is taking place.God Created & Instituted both Marriage & Family in a Holy and sanctified manner & purpose. Marriage laws are laid by God Himself from the very beginning. Man created communes, wife swapping, Live in relationship, Cohabitation for unholy pleasures and selfishness etc. The Bible says, you cannot be yoked with unequal belief and standards which is true both in spiritual and general cases. So an adult marrying a kid is not right.What proof do you have God created marriage?The God inspired word that is the Bible says that...I understand many people belief this to be the case but at the end of the day they believe this because they were told to believe it and for no other reason that that.
I believe in God, but I do not believe he invented marriage or dictated the Bible.
This is a very good article. I am really scared of having sex before marriage...
I had sex before marriage but nothing happened...but many in India they suffered for this. So i think what i did is wrong and other should not do...
Good article.
very nicely written & good points.
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